Before I entered university, I had a period of time when I had to take a break from school due to severe depression. During that phase, I could barely calm my mind enough to focus on anything. Even something as simple as hanging up clothes felt overwhelmingly exhausting. Every day felt like a burden—just staying alive was draining. I often spent hours crying, sometimes with no clear reason.
Something I once deeply loved—drawing—became a heavy burden. I couldn’t tolerate even the slightest imperfection, especially in my art.
The year from 2020 to 2021 was truly the darkest time of my life. I was carrying the heavy pressure of the national college entrance exam, while also struggling under family pressure. I honestly felt like I wanted to leave this world every single day. It was as if my emotions had disappeared. I existed more like a passerby in the world than someone truly living.
I remember going to the cinema with friends. As I watched comedies and tragedies unfold on the big screen, the only thoughts in my head were: “Oh, this is the part where I’m supposed to cry… now I should laugh.” In order not to appear different from others, I forced myself to act like I had emotions—but only I knew that in my world, there was nothing but despair. And sometimes, even despair disappeared, leaving only emptiness.
During that time, I tried many different methods—seeing therapists, taking medication, distracting myself with various activities. But nothing truly helped. They may have provided temporary relief, but none could sustain it.
Just when I felt I had nowhere else to turn, I came into contact with Shindo through my father. I was also fortunate enough to connect with Mr. Way Sun. I shared my situation with him, and he taught me just one method. That one simple guidance pulled me out of the deep hopelessness I was in.
After that, every time I felt overwhelmed by emotions, I practiced what he taught me. Gradually, I noticed the time I spent trapped in negative emotions became shorter and shorter. I began to open myself up to the outside world again—and I felt something I hadn’t felt in a long time: emotion.
For the first time in a year, I found myself laughing naturally at a comedy, and crying uncontrollably at a sad scene. These responses, which had once felt so distant and unreachable, were now happening effortlessly.
After nearly three years of learning Shindo, I feel like a completely different person. It has truly transformed me from the inside out. During this journey, even my depression gradually healed. I used to see drawing as something terrifying, something I could never do—but now, I keep growing and improving in this area, steadily unlocking my talent. No matter what challenges I face now, I’m no longer afraid.
These are things I never dared to imagine before. Back then, I had read online that depression was something you could never truly recover from. That left me in complete despair. I didn’t dare hope that I could ever get better, let alone become stronger and more joyful than I was before.
As a university student, I know there are still many things I haven’t yet mastered. But now, I have a clear roadmap for life. As long as I walk this path, I know I will reach my destination—Learn Wisdom and Set Life Direction, Correct My Behavior, Find My Talent, and Practice Until Mastery.
As I write this, tears are streaming down my face. I am deeply grateful to my teacher. Looking back over these past three years, I am overwhelmed with emotion. The transformation I’ve experienced is far beyond what words can express. For now, I’ll stop here.
